Read the following internal monologues one at a time.  Judge each by the following:

o       Is the piece mostly an internal monologue?

o       Does the internal monologue make sense/read clearly?

o       Is the internal monologue realistic?

o       Does the internal monologue convey the decisions the student made about the woman?

o       Does the internal monologue TELL you explicitly about the character, or does the monologue SHOW you (through description and/or character’s voice) who the character is and what’s going on?

SAMPLE 1

Point of view? 1^st person

Who is she?  A company owner

Portrayal?  Scared, confused

Where?  Downtown

Situation? ????????

I was running to a business meeting that day in downtown.  I was late and was in a hurry.  It seemed if I was being watched or followed.  A bunch of men kept staring at me as if they were gonna grab me and take me with them somewhere by force.  I think I was paranoid though.  No one else seemed to notice what I was seeing in the same manner.  That was the most awkward that last year.

SAMPLE 2

Point of view? 3^rd person

Who is she?  ??????????

Portrayal?  ?????????

Where?  ?????????

Situation? ?????????

As the men turned their heads, whispers going about, there was not another woman in sight.  What do they want?  Have they ever seen a woman before?  This young single woman walking down the man filled street was getting a lot of attention.  She  was always a nice young woman, didn’t think anything would happen to her.  Her name was Mary, and has dealed with a lot of men before, so she decided just to walk by them.

SAMPLE 3

Point of view? 3^rd person

Who is she?  one of the first business lady

Portrayal?  not intimidated, strong

Where?  downtown business area

Situation? walking down the street from work

A lady walks down the street in the downtown are while guys shout out coments like What do you know about bussines and stick with baking pies.  Why are people like this she wonders while ignoring the coments shes receiving.  Just wait untill I become the richest bussiness woman and then lets see what the have to say.  One day women and men will have equal rights.

SAMPLE 4

Point of view? 1st

Who is she?  The woman’s name is Nancy.  She is about 25.

Portrayal?  She is mad and lost.

Where?  coming from a boyfriend’s

Situation? She and her boyfriend got into an argument.

I can’t believe he had the nerve to tell me that.  We’ll see if I call him again.  She continued to walk.  Was I suppose to turn there.  Oh well.  He’s so wrong and he knows he is.  Like I didn’t see him with Penelope.  Where am I?  Anyway, she told me she was with him.  Where did all these guys come from?  Where am I?  Should I ask one of them?  She looks around.  These men are acting as if though they’ve never seen a woman.  They want me.  Why doesn’t he?  Why do I continually take him back?  Oh man I’m really lost.  I’ll show him.  I’ll show him that I don’t need him.  Oh there’s the bus.